In my lifetime, I’ve only met a handful of people who don’t seem to care what other people think of them. Conversely, the vast majority of people care passionately about their personal and professional reputation. However, when you make a decision to lift your ambitions above the average and you position yourself in the role of leader, you will immediately receive significantly more scrutiny.
As we consider the question of ‘How To Overcome The Negativity Of Others’ I will commence with a profound statement.
I feel you can choose to be a significant achiever and a leader or you can seek to be liked by everyone. It is very difficult, some would say impossible, to succeed in both objectives.
The challenge of achieving your goals and pursuing your life dreams and ambitions means you’ll need to develop a habit and for thinking differently to the majority of people.
You will need to find discipline and resilience – two attitudes that most people find difficult to muster. Many of life’s prominent achievers have succeeded because they have chosen to think, behave, talk and express desire in a manner that many other people simply cannot do.
The people who have chosen a life of drifting and hoping over planning and navigating fall into the comfortable place whereby they have chosen to accept mediocrity.
Please don’t misunderstand my words. I have friends and family that don’t necessarily possess my hunger and my desire to be the best that I can be in life and business. We are not all ambitious to live our best life.
As I share these thoughts, please don’t misinterpret me. I am not being judgemental about the choices of others. I am simply reflecting on what is clear and plain to see in this world.
There are an overwhelming number of people who are addicted to television or smartphone entertainment. They go out for meal with their partner and find what is happening on Facebook as more interesting and precious than looking into their partner’s eyes, enjoying the food and savouring the environment.
Then there are those people who love to sit gossiping and judging others. They carry a demeanour of negativity that is very hard for positive people to tolerate.
The worst kind of people for me are what I call the “haters” or the Social Media “trolls”. These are the people who have made it their hobby to attack anyone who chooses to pursue greatness or a desire to lead. The haters and the trolls seek to bring people down with their keyboard warrior tactics.
As they do this, they convince themselves that their excuses and reasons for hating are justified. In many instances, the haters are what I call life’s plodders or floaters. They scratch their heads at your passion and zest for life. They find the very nature of you lifting your head above the parapet as a leader, seeking to fulfil your greatest potential, becoming a master of your craft and respected in your field as irritating as totally irritating.
If you are to pursue a life of your dreams and design, you will need to make a decision to leave the moods of the majority and seek to be in the 15% club. You will need to make a decision to live a life that only a small number of enlightened people can do.
This means you might become the occasional victim of some harsh criticism. Some people may laugh at your passion, others will privately sneer at your determination. But, as you consider these realties, try to remember that the people who choose to share a similar path to you will give you all of the fuel and the shield of protection that you need to turn your other cheek and to smile respectfully at your haters and critics.
As I set about my work, I focus hard at being a patient and kind person – a respectful human being. I always try to make time for people. I make eye content with those who I meet with. I share ideas to stimulate fun and inspiration and I want to be someone that people see as authentic – because the person that I show to the world is really the person that I am. Some people decide this is not true and although it’s hurtful, I’ve come to realise I should not focus any effort on those that choose to judge me this way.
As I reflect on people that I have admired in my life, I have seen some of them placed on a magnificent pedestal by some elements of the British Media. These people often become heros and icons.
But then the same people that made them into icons seek to destroy them by picking on some of their smallest human frailties.
I remember with fondness the late Jade Goody. Jade went into Big Brother and demonstrated her naive side. The newspapers ridiculed her lack of geography knowledge. However, as she became sought after for television appearances, people began to realise that there was a beauty in her fun, simple and kind character – something to be admired in how she overcame her childhood challenges.
Her sense of fun and her honest vulnerability (and her acknowledged shortcomings) eventually drew her huge respect. People began to like her, then respect her and eventually many people grew to love her. She left the world as a respected and brave person. In 2009, even the British Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, paid her a deserved tribute when she died.
David Beckahm is a living example of a man who has given up his time for his country and for charity. Over the years, he has been ridiculed and idolised in equal proportions. And now it’s his turn to be torn apart because someone illegally accessed his private emails and then conveniently chose to sell stories around the ones that made him look the worst.
Leaders always get positive and negative scrutiny. You can just look at any great actor, author, sportsperson, inventor or even our great and late politician. Any person who has sought to be more than mediocre and who has achieved something at an exceptional level will be the victim of cynics.
Those people that choose to sneer at you will know that they too have the opportunity to pursue something great. Your hunger, your desire and your bravery can make the haters feel inadequate but quickly after this feeling comes the shame of their inside knowledge – the little voice inside their head that reminds them they too have life potential.
Many negative people do reach a point in life where they realise, even if it is only for a fleeting moment, that we are all are born into a world that offers us the potential to do whatever we are totally committed to.
I subscribe to the view that life progress is less about your inherited, natural intelligence and more about your discipline and your habits. We all want a life of our design but how many people are willing to take the steps to transfer the ideas in their head into a workable plan that can be made real?
Sadly, some people find it easier to hurl criticism and scorn at the icons than to make a plan to design the life that gives some of what the icons enjoy.
So, I conclude this article with this advice.
You can choose to listen too much to your haters. Try to resist becoming part of what I call “the victim herd” by saying it’s too hard to lead and to achieve. None of us should attack or criticise people who choose the path above mediocrity and, as you inevitably find yourself as the occasional victim of criticism and scorn, simply remind yourself that to be great you have to show great courage and resolve.
Not everyone will love and respect you but those that are worth having in your life will wash away the effects of the negative people.
About Julianna Beavan
Julianna Beavan is one of the world’s most respected Business Coaches and Network Marketers. With a proven track record in helping people to take better control of their financial and lifestyle circumstances, via exciting options that exist in the health & wellness sector. Julianna is often commended for her inspiring coaching style – never neglecting the important human aspects of being warm, supportive and humble towards all those who approach her with a serious business appetite and the discipline to succeed.
If you would like a totally free and no strings attached personal consultation with Julianna, please make direct contact via this website. Here is a personal message from Julianna. Julianna guarantees you will have an opportunity to consider working directly and personally with her.